Hey Reader👋
In this newsletter, I will share 2 personal incidents that taught me why it is essential to learn defence, channel anger and be courageous.
Let’s Get Started 🚀
The Gym Stare
In October 2020, after gaining a few kgs, I decided to join the gym and get fit. The first day was quite awkward as I couldn’t pull off the basic regime, thanks to the lockdown and binge eating.
There were only 3 girls in my evening time slot. After a month of basic stuff, I started with weights.
When I used to enter the weights section, many guys would be training there. I used to experience a trail of eyes on me.
Since I knew how patriarchal and conventional the society is, I wasn’t afraid, but there was something in me that wanted to rebel and scream.
The staring is generalised so much like it’s common.
Face it, women, cause if you speak out, you will be claimed as a nazi feminist, and those guys are doing nothing wrong.
I wish men were taught how to act around women.
What did I do- I stared back at them until they looked away. My eyes were full of accountability and with a stoic expression. Gave them the taste of their own medicine.😏
After a few days, I stopped getting the look and the anxious vibe I used to experience; it got replaced with a sense of power.
When a new girl joined in and walked up to me asking how I could simply go into any section and use any machine without getting intimidated by the looks, I taught her the trick 😉
To all the men reading this newsletter, please always create a safe space for women and if your friends make a sexist comment and you listen to them silently, you encourage them. Speak up. Change starts with all of us.
Round and Round
At the end of October 2021, I went on a girls’ trip to Rishikesh.
We were four people on 2 scooters. After dinner and clicking some pictures on the bridge around 10 PM, we returned to our hostel.
We observed 2 guys on a scooter following us. They passed us on the bridge as well. At first, we thought we might be wrong, so we started moving slowly. They knew we knew, so they passed us and turned toward where most hostels were located. No brainer for that.
We didn’t take the turn but started to move ahead on the main road. After 2 min, again, the scooter was back following us. We turned around and started moving in the opposite direction with speed to check, and they followed like dogs.
Instead of getting afraid, all four of us were calm and enjoying this. Our background, well, 2 girls from our group were from the army background, and the rest 2 of us knew how to defend, so we slowed our speed and again let them pass.
Now, we started chasing them, opened the phone recorder and started speaking the no of the vehicle loudly.
They came to a halt. We stopped our vehicle and questioned them about chasing. They started to fumble with words, well we just shouted the no. of the vehicle.
The argument ended with them apologising, and they won’t do it again.
All it took was a moment of courage and smart mouth.
Major lessons I learned as women
No one is going to come to save you, so you better get equipped as much as you can
If you can’t learn how to fight, go to the gym or run, make your body strong, and practice some basic kicks and punches- Youtube is free.
Look in the eye of fear and observe it disappearing.
Never be afraid to stand up for yourself.
Always stand for what’s right without considering whether someone else is doing it. When you stand for the right thing, people will join you.
The world is as much yours as someone else so don’t ever stop exploring it because of certain negative elements. Eliminate them.
Some Interesting Tweets
Fam Cures Heartbreak ft. Ritviz
I found it super cute. Our mothers are always there whenever we feel low and during heartbreaks.
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Wish You Well
With Love
Nainika.